Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Keenan Cahill: Making The Internetz Awesome

Last Friday I sent this video to a few people but I now realize that I should try to spread it around the internet as much as possible.

Some other golden examples:

And of course:

Saturday, February 21, 2009

Error - Does Not Compute

This has syntax errors... doesn't it?

This one makes more sense, so far as not having coding errors...

Friday, February 20, 2009

Monday, February 16, 2009

How Is Her Being Transgender Relevant?

Exercised to Death!
Here is a bizarre story that I just saw a preview for on CBS 2: CLICKY

This story is strange, but as the title says - what does her gender have to do with anything? Sensationalism.

Besides, they are really missing the biggest question: Why Oliva Newton John?

Peta Is Gonna Be Pissed

Travis, an infamous chimp from Connecticut, was shot and killed after a brutal attack of a woman who was visiting his owner.

Check out the story here.

The Final Straw

The fifth and final part of my Cocktail Hour series has arrived!
I will be focusing on flavor, flair and more.

There are lots of mixers out there and I am sure you know the usual suspects (like Cola, Fruit Juices and Tonics etc). But there is an emerging market of cocktail mixers which take out the guess work and are quite nifty. There are a variety of flavors like watermelon, passion fruit, grapefruit and apple. You can use them for martinis, margaritas and a variety of other drinks. Don't let the bottle dictate use. Experiment!

Here is an example:

Stirrings Pomegranate Cocktail Mix

Another flavor that is essential for many classy cocktails is simple syrup. It is way easy to make and you can keep it in a squirt bottle for easy use and storage.
2 1/2 cups sugar
Full 1 cup water
1/2 lemon, juiced
-Combine all 3 ingredients in a nonreactive 2-quart heavy-bottomed saucepan over medium-high heat and bring to a boil. All the sugar crystals should completely dissolve. Remove from the heat and pour into a clean medium-size bowl. Let cool completely before using. If you are short on time, you can cool the syrup over an ice bath. Simple syrup can be stored in the refrigerator, indefinitely, if kept in an airtight container. - (borrowed from foodnetwork.com)
This can be infused with other flavors as well if you want to get crazy.

Garnishes can really be the crowning touch on a really elegant cocktail. It is more than just drinking if you jazz things up with a fancy garnish.

Lemon twists, lime wheels, orange wedges, olives, cherries, apple slices, pineapple spikes, and rimmers.

Here are a couple useful videos for getting your garnish just right:

I encourage you to YouTubez tips on creating the perfect bar garnishes. There are about a billion and a half videos that are extremely useful. Thank you internets.

More on Rimmers
Margaritas, some martinis and many other cocktails call for the glass to be rimmed. This is when you wet the edge of the glass (with liquor, rind oils, fruit juice, water, whatever) and dip it into sugar, salt or whatever. It is an elegant look and is a step that should not be neglected.

You can buy your own rimmer set, like this one, which allows you to create your own flavored sugars, blend of salts, etc:

Or you can get premade blends of rimmers like this one from Stirrings:
Lemon Drop Drink Rimmer

And More
There are a zillion other things you can add to your cocktail to really punch up the wow factor. For me, the easiest way is cocktail straws. You can get ones that match the theme of you party or go with classic red or black.

And who can forget umbrellas?!? Super fun and the only way to complete a tropical drink!
Paper Drink Umbrellas

Happy Cocktail Hour!!

Saturday, February 14, 2009

Move It!

So about one year ago I was searching for a clip of Pulp Fiction on the YouTubez and got a video of kinetic typography in the results. This moment changed my life. I am now obsessed with kinetic typography. I love it. I wish I could do it, but I just can't afford the software.

There are a lot more that are totally awesome so I encourage you to look it up on the interwebs. But, I must warn you that people spell things wrong, make typos, or errors in writing down what was actually said in the scene/song/speech/whatev - I find this SO annoying and unforgivable - you are working with words, spell check mofos.

Friday, February 13, 2009


And now for an ode to my new favorite ridiculous person: Lady GaGa

Missy Piggy Cuts The Fat

While browsing the interwebs I came across this People Magazine Online article that says Miss Piggy, of Muppets fame, has lost weight.

I would like her diet secrets.

Thursday, February 12, 2009


Kingsford Goes to the Beach - Watch the top videos of the week here

No Cuddling, EVER!

So Kate and I were watching some TV (reruns of Burn Notice to be exact *new episode tonight*) and a ridiculous commercial came on for an online dating service.

- a dating site for singles who enjoy being single -

Things I Like About This Site:
1. the logo: puzzle pieces = fantastic.
2. the slogan: finding the pieces without the puzzle.
3. the ten commandments of of the booty call. HAHAHAHHA

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Glass Half Full

And now for part 4 of my Cocktail Hour series.

Now that you have some rules for entertaining, barware and booze - you need something to put it in.

You will need the following glasses:

Martini Glass


Highball Glass

Margarita Glass

Rocks Glass

Shot Glass

I really like simple glasses, as you can see with these examples. I like smooth clean lines and think they really let your cocktail shine.

And you should have a set of wine glasses.
You can go trendy and get these stemless ones:
Riedel 'O' Stemless Wine Glass

But I prefer these ones with stems - it seems like you can get better temperature control (if necessary for the wine you are drinking) if they have stems.
Riedel Vivant Collection

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Drinking Spirits Cannot Cause Spiritual Damage

My Spirits Checklist:

Svedka Vodka
Absolute Flavored Vodkas (whatever you like & will use)

Seagram's Extra Dry Gin
Seagram's Apple Gin


Bacardi Superior White Rum
Bacardi Razz Rum
Captain Morgan Spiced Rum (when necessary but I prefer light rum hands down)


Patron Silver Tequila
Cazadores Tequila Blanco
Cazadores Tequila Anejo

Irish Whiskey

Jameson Irish Whiskey


Johnnie Walker Scotch Red
Laphroaig Scotch (because Courtney said so)

American Whiskey
Jack Daniels Whiskey
Seagrams 7 Crown American Whiskey
-Southern Comfort Bourbon

Canadian Whiskey
Crown Royal Canadian Whiskey

Bailey's Irish Cream
Hiram Walker Triple Sec
Amaretto di Amore

I am sure this list is lacking but these are the ones I could think of that I like and use regularly.

Do Not Attempt

Monday, February 9, 2009

Interstitial Hilarity

Sony Releases New Stupid Piece Of Shit That Doesn't Fucking Work

motherfucking time vampire.

Cocktail Concierge

Bar Essentials

As promised, here is part two of my Cocktail Hour series of blog posts. I created a selection of bar essentials that I think are simple, elegant and necessary. I borrowed from the pamphlet list I mentioned in the last post and added in a few more things that I thought would be extra handy.

Check back for part three (spirits checklist), part four (glassware) and part five (flavor, flair and more).

You Can Buy An Education, But You Can't Buy Class

At BevMo! the other day, Courtney and I picked up a couple little pamphlets with drink recipes and entertaining guidelines. I didn't read it until today but they have proven incredibly useful and interesting.

They give the following timeline for planning a cocktail party:
4 weeks prior: Send invitations
3 weeks prior: Order party accessories
2 weeks prior: Order specialty ingredients
1 week prior: Order desserts and flowers
2 days prior: Buy non-perishable items and spirits
Day before: Pick up flowers and perishable ingredients (remember garnishes and ice)
Morning of: Decorate house. Set table and cocktail station. Prepare apperizers and refrigerate.
Hour of: Set out appetizers and non-alcoholic beverages and make your signature cocktail.

I have modified this timeline for people like me:
1 week prior: Make facebook event, invite the hell out of people, be sure to mention BYOB because you can't finance everyone's drunkenness.
1 day prior (maybe) or day of: Buy cart load of alcohol at Ralphs, biggest bag of red cups, maybe a bag a chips
Hour of: Worry a little that either not enough people will show up to consume all alcohol and think oh well, more for me. OR worry that too many people will show up and your party will soar too high too fast and then think oh well, I will be drunk.
During: Entertain and forget all of your responsibilities

And Now For Cocktails I am going to try:

1oz whiskey
2oz sweet and sour mix
1/4 oz Triple Sec
Shake & serve over ice.

1.5oz Vodka
3oz Orange Juice
Splash Grand Marnier
Splash Lemon Lime Soda
Shake & serve over ice.

(Gin) Madras
1.5oz Gin
2oz Orange Juice
2oz Cranberry Juice
Serve over ice.

(Rum) Pineapple Splash
1.5oz White Rum
4oz Orange Juice
Splash Grenadine
Serve over ice.

Washington Apple
1oz Whiskey
1/2oz Apple Vodka
2oz Cranberry Juice
Serve over ice.

(Vodka) Madras
1.5oz Vodka
3oz Cranberry Juice
1oz Orange Juice
Shake & strain into champagne flute.

(Vodka) Diddy
1.5oz Vodka
3oz Lemonade
Shake & strain into chilled martini glass.

There are lots more pearls of wisdom in the little pamphlets which I will share later.

Saturday, February 7, 2009

For When I Am Too Lazy To Speak

This make me giggle and I like to use it to annoy Courtney.

Also, I added the "Follow This Blog" feature. Please do it.

Tuesday, February 3, 2009